OK, we’re at 14 weeks, or T-minus 182 days until the ETA of Baby Jarrett and the impending demise of Life As We Know It.
We are now unequivocally in the second trimester, or as I call it, the boring trimester, not that there’s anything wrong with that. Before you freak out on me, I know the next 14 weeks won’t actually be boring; we’re only a few weeks away from the excitement of learning the gender (sorry, I refuse to use “sex” when there’s a perfectly good synonym that doesn’t have an alternate definition) and in some ways it gets more exciting with each passing day.
But at the same time, each week seems like an eternity now for this dear ol’ dad-to-be, as the initial effects of Megan’s “condition” have begun to wear off and we’re firmly entrenched in the no-news-is-good-news phase. No kicking yet, no “baby bump,” as they like to call it on E!, just biding our time.
Just when I start to think nothing is happening, though, along comes that weekly e-mail update from BabyCenter.com to BLOW MY FREAKIN’ MIND.
From head to bottom, the little mo is now about 3.5 inches and weighs about 1.5 ounces, which apparently is about the size of a lemon, so the “Butterbean” moniker is growing less appropriate all the time. But that’s not the best part. (Forgive the parenthetical additions, but I don’t want anyone to jump to any conclusions.)
“Your baby can now squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his (or her) thumb.”
Pee? Really? Hmmm.
“His (or her) kidneys are producing urine, which he (or she) releases into the amniotic fluid around him (or her) — a process he’ll keep up until birth.”
Aha! It is human nature to pee in the pool! I knew it!
This really is a learning experience.